March 15th, 2020 All That Matters
Since our last edition: I’ve maintained the integrity of my food plan boundaries, I’ve remained refined sugar-free, I’ve met or exceeded my daily water goal, and I’ve stayed well connected with exceptional support.
These are strange times for so many of us. Many are directly affected, others, indirectly via the fear and anxiety of the uncertain unknown of where this leads. It will pass but when? In the meantime, we do the best we can and we hunker down–and try, as hard as it might be, to not let the creative parts of our brain create worst-case scenarios.
I have friends that are in the middle of dire circumstances because of this pandemic. They don’t have to create or imagine worst-case things–they’re living it every day. I’m not sure how they’re managing the stress. I can’t even imagine. What can we do? Hopefully, this passes quickly.
I’ve felt nervous energy lately. It’s unsettling. Mom is handling things as best she can, however, yesterday’s isolation mandate (it’s probably called something other than that) really disrupted her peaceful acceptance of the necessary changes. All nursing home residents who are capable of feeding themselves are kept in their rooms during mealtimes. Mealtime served as social hours for mom and so many others. Day 2 in her room without it and she’s super agitated. I’m staying in contact with her via phone several times per day and encouraging other family members to call her, too.
One thing that’s helping me is staying connected with gratitude. Gratitude plays a very important part of the prayer, meditation, visualizations, and affirmations of the daily foundational practice. I’m also reading inspiring literature from those who take care of their own daily practice.
There’s a lot that’s uncertain. One thing that is certain: Excess food will not fix this situation. If I abandon my plan, it’ll give me intense moments of distraction followed by crippling, depressing, sobering, paralyzing, and much longer uncertainty.
I am not strong and I don’t operate on will power. If I only had those to rely on, I’d weigh over 500 pounds again, right now. I can make it through challenging times by holding onto the rails of this personal and imperfect daily practice. My response must be to tighten certain elements of it, rather than loosen. My spiritual-mental-emotional foundational practice must be priority number one. My food plan must be intentional and measured. My connections with support contacts must be consistent. And I could use some more exercise. I can always use more physical activity.
It also helps to get out of my own head and give attention and focus on people I love. Noah and I have waited some time–too long, really, to hang out, so we made that happen last night. We enjoyed dinner together, a movie (Pixar’s Onward), and he stayed over for the night. He read me a book, too. He’s tops in his first-grade class in reading! He loves books and I’m so glad. The time we spent together was needed for both of us.
My little granddaughter Raegan turns two years old today! She’s coming for a visit later in the week. We’re planning a party for her, too. Phoebe is only two weeks behind Raegan and soon, very soon–Oliver will be turning three! When I think of these four grandchildren and the good relationships I have with my daughters, it fills up my heart in the most beautiful ways. I have so much worthy of my gratitude.
If I were to ever take a deep dive into the food, I’d immediately be blinded to all the good in my life–replaced with a deep, dark cloud of obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors. I pray I never do that again. But I’m always one choice away from heading in that direction. Like I’ve said many times, I don’t live in fear of this possibility, I simply do my best to maintain a healthy respect for the disease of compulsive overeating/food addiction. To this day, some close to me think I’m somewhat OCD with the practices I make important. They don’t get it. They don’t have to get it. As long as I get it, and continue getting it each brand new day, that’s all that matters.
View this post on Instagram#whatsfordinner Shredded Beef Enchiladas. Three medium soft corn tortillas, approximately 6oz shredded beef, approximately 2oz refined sugar-free enchilada sauce, approximately 30g lettuce, approximately 2 tablespoons sour cream, 8 tortilla chips and approximately 4 tbs salsa. #bigdinner #dailypractice #nocheeseplease #foodplan 691 cal. Big meal!
View this post on Instagram#whatsfordinner #secondmealofday Sour Cream Chicken Fajita Crispy Tacos! Three crispy corn taco shells sharing approximately 6oz fajita chicken, approximately 3 tbs sour cream, approximately 1/2 cup grilled peppers and onions, and approximately 28g shredded white cheddar. #dailypractice #foodplan #whatilike 635 cal.
View this post on Instagram#whatsforbreakfast 170g simply potatoes diced and pan prepared with 43g red onions, 2.4oz sliced white mushrooms, and approximately 4 seconds olive oil cooking spray. 2 egg whites & 2 whole eggs, scrambled and topped with 1 slice (.8oz) muenster. Sprouted grain Ezekiel toast topped with 42g avocado, mashed and seasoned simply with salt & pepper. #dailypractice #foodplan #weighandmeasure 606 cal.
Do you own an “I’m Choosing Change” wristband? I wear mine daily as a constant reminder of why my daily practice of things is important. For me, it’s simply a daily reminder to be open, willing, mindful, to pause, and to be intentional. If I’m not those things, I get stuck at the line of least resistance and back there is where the old patterns and behaviors thrive. Your order includes priority shipping so you’ll get it quickly! Here’s the link to order yours right now: https://imchoosingchange.com/product/wristband/
My website shares a phone number with my podcast, Transformation Planet, and it’s always available for you! Have a question? Want to share your story? Leave a voicemail or Text me! 580-491-2228 I’ll text you back!
Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Practice, peace, and calm,
My website: www.imchoosingchange.com
If you’re interested in connecting via social media:
I accept friend requests on MyFitnessPal. My daily food logging diary is set to public.
MFP Username: SeanAAnderson
My Twitter: SeanAAnderson
Also–I’d love you to subscribe to my podcast Transformation Planet! You can find it in Apple Podcasts, in the Google Play store for Android, and listed wherever you find your favorite podcasts! If you haven’t listened before, you’ll find 20 episodes waiting for you!
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